A Sense of Loss


Oh, Dear.

Where have you gone,
can you not see me,
hear me, feel me near?

Why are you so still,
so very quiet,
unlike you, like this?

Oh fear,
something is amiss, Dear.

I cannot see, touch, nor hear,
just sense cold, an absence,
you’re no longer here.

I don’t know what to do,
but I cannot stay,
like this, without you. 

Oh dear.

✥ ✥ ✥ ✥ ✥ ✥ ✥ ✥ ✥ ✥ ✥

I don’t often try poetry, but when I saw this image, Woman with Long Hair by Man Ray (1929), and read my friend Björn Rudberg’s (real poet) poem RAPUNZEL’S MIRANDA… I knew I wanted to try something. The old photograph immediately reminded me of Graceland Cemetery in Chicago, a deep sadness came over me and I felt a sense of loss.

So, here’s my entry for Kerry O’Conner’s Real Toads ~ Camera Flash!




15 responses

  1. Excellent take on the prompt! Giving voice to the dead is always interesting. the photo reminded me of an old black and white vampire flick, but I didn’t write about vampires. the old cemeteries give a sense of sadness, don’t they? To see what the dead leave behind.

  2. kaykuala

    I cannot see, touch, nor hear,
    just sense cold, an absence,
    you’re no longer here.

    The sense of loss can be really felt when close relationships are compromised.


  3. Nicely done. I went down that same path


  4. You have conveyed the funereal mood very well in this monologue. It is truly sad to contemplate the loss of even one life.

  5. Oh Dear, how sad with a death like that. Nice work with the rhymes.

  6. Great work , tragic voice

  7. Could feel the loss and despair in the poem, complements the photo so well!

  8. Beautifully poignant.

  9. This brings out the pain I see in the image so well. Nice writing!

  10. This is poignantly written. It touches on senses that are so deeply rooted, that words often escape us, but your translation works very well – an excellent reading of the fascinating image by Man Ray.

  11. Ah, now that I’ve read your words she does look dead. I didn’t see that before.

  12. Ah. She actually reminds me of when Kim Basinger played a corpse in the Tom Petty video, remember that?

  13. I love Man Ray and your poem. Nice work!

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